November/December, 2023  

Exuding Calm Like a Duck Gliding on Water

Kay Fittes, December, 2023

My recent Tip Tuesday social media post read “To have a great professional reputation as confident, on top of things, and unflappable—be a duck!  Yep, be a duck!  You may be peddling like the very devil underwater but on top you look like you are gliding over water.  Bosses, employees, clients, and co-workers think highly of individuals who have their act together.  Craft your reputation by being a duck.”  After I posted it, three clients reached out to me asking me to do a deeper dive into how this applies to leaders.  I realized they were likely not the only ones who could benefit from this information.

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Kay’s Consulting Corner

Each month in this section, Kay offers actionable career consulting tips.

Actions to Keep Calm

1. Utilizing breath.  You have heard the value of deep breathing to induce calmness repeatedly.  Do you do it?  The wow factor of deep beathing – it can be done anywhere, it can be done quickly, it can be done with no additional tools!  Most people take short, shallow breaths.  This type of breathing can make you feel more anxious and deplete your energy.  Deep breathing is a valuable tool for creating that leadership calm state.
   
   
   • Close your eyes and get comfortable, place your hands on your stomach
   • Breathe in through your nose, hold for a count of three
   • Breathe out through your nose to a count of seven, making sound as you exhale
   • Focus on the breath and only the breath
   • Repeat three times and pay attention to how you feel
     
     
2. Utilizing tools.  Phone apps to help manage stress and keep calm abound.  Many are free.  I like the Calm app.  This is great if you want a guided breathing exercise.  You can do a free trial.  Their premium version has tons of options.  My current favorite is Insight Timer.  It is a treasure trove of free tools: breathing, mood assessment, quotes, and tons more.  Go to your App Store and go a little crazy, you’ll find something that you will love to keep your calm.  Keep a stress ball at your desk and use it!  I have a family member that swears by her Dammit Doll.  As Google will tell you, “The Classic Dammit Doll is engineered to absorb all that negative energy so you can let go and get your happy back on.”
   
   
3. Utilizing refueling.  To be a calm leader you must be refueled, reenergized, and renewed.  It’s great to pull out needed tools during times of extra challenges but prevention is part of the plan, too.  Remember, “Empty wells do not quench thirst.”  Part of your responsibility as a leader is to do these three R’s.  Taking time to refuel, reenergize, and renew are essential.  As a leader, you OWE this to your team.  If you have given everything you’ve got, you have no inner gliding duck, only flailing goose.  What are you doing to refuel, reenergize and renew?  You can do Yoga online in your home office, you can go to an indoor or outdoor Farmer’s Market, you can participate in your favorite hobby.   When you say you don’t have time, you are saying you don’t have time to be a calm leader for your employees.  Even more, you are saying you don’t have time to take care of you and your inner duck!
   

Are you concerned that your ability to stay calm under pressure is damaging your team and your leadership reputation?  Don’t let the situation continue one more day.  I work with many leaders to add “Duck” behavior and many other skills to their leadership toolbox.  Unsure if this could be of benefit to you?  Let’s find out with a complimentary consultation.  High-Heeled Success offers 45-minute complimentary telephone consulting.  Email kay@highheeledsuccess.com or call the office at (513) 561-4288 to set a time for us to chat.

Testimonial - Cynthia Lanham 

When I first asked Kay Fittes to be a guest speaker at Midway Toastmasters, I was astounded by her absolute attentiveness to meeting the needs of our club with her presentation.  As we spoke beforehand, we both agreed to transform her visit into an Open House experience.  And that was the best decision we ever could have made.

Kay is one of the best speakers we have ever had at our club.  Her interactive 30-minute presentation engaged the audience the entire time.  I was impressed with her from day one when she asked for a phone call to clarify what we wanted to accomplish with her presentation so she could tailor her presentation to meet our needs.  At all times, she kept our wants and needs foremost in her mind.  She sent me an excellent bio, pictures and additional info that I could use to promote her as well as to introduce her.  Due to this excellent information, we were able to promote her easily, garnering interest from more people than normally attend an open house.  We even received interest in her presentation from various women’s groups and nonprofits in the area.  She also decided to give away prizes to attract more people to the event.  I was really blown away by the amount of time, attention, organization and attention to detail she put into this event.

She stayed in the meeting after her presentation and even stayed after the end of the meeting during our social time engaging in members and entertaining questions.  She made every person who asked a question feel valued and she answered the questions with ease and assurance.

Kay is the type of person who likes to build others up.  Each person left elevated in some way after interacting with her.  Kay’s program of “Kick Your Success Roadblocks to the Curb” rang true to everyone whether male or female.  She made the material relatable to all the listeners.  She was energetic and enthusiastic, which was contagious to all of us.  After her presentation, people raved about how much her presentation meant to them.  She gave them specifics to work on.  Her relaxed style and humor were infectious and made the presentation all the more appealing.  I have not seen a virtual speaker engage the audience as well as she did.

After all she did to give such a phenomenal presentation, she wanted to talk to me the next day for feedback.  Did she deliver on what we wanted her to do?  Are there ways she can improve?  That tells me she REALLY cares about improving.  I would unquestionably recommend Kay to anyone needing a guest speaker at any event.  Would I invite her back as a speaker?  Definitely!  No question.

Cynthia Lanham DTM
Midway Toastmasters
President

High-Heeled Success^® supports Dress for Success through donations of clothing, time and money.  We offer complimentary seats at every workshop for women participating in the Dress for Success program.

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